Forced Beliefs

From a very young age I was always taught to not ask questions and to just go with what I was told. I never questioned why my mother made me go to church… I just went. 

As I got older I found myself more and more uncomfortable and not wanting to go to a baptist church anymore. It wasn’t as if this feeling of disbelief and uncomfortablity was new. It has simply been surpressed for so long that when it finally began to come back up it felt new. With that feeling in the pit of my gut I stoped going to church on sundays when I was 16. (At least baptist church). I branched out and gave Catholic Church a try. But that too did not feel comfortable to me. Neither of these churches made me feel a sense of belonging so I stoped going to any form of church by age 17. 

As years passed I would say I believed in God. I believed in a sense that I knew nothing different and I still didn’t question anything. It wasn’t until I took a Christian studies class in college that my eyes opened and I began to listen to myself. 

My self was telling me that sorry to say I wasn’t a Christian. I also wasn’t full blown atheist. I had this hunger and desire inside of me to know that something out their was a higher power. But at the same time I didn’t really believe in it. 

For a while I was happy in my new found discover of who I was. That was until my sister decided that she was going g back to church. At first it had no affect on my life. That was until she made the state that in the new year if you lived in her house you would GO To CHURCH those words at first pissed me off. But now everytime I get up to go to church it is like another match is added to this fire within me. This fire is a growing hatred that I have towards my sister. 

I try to tell myself that I am being over dramatic and that it’s not that bad. However the truth of it is when someone else is trying to push their religious beliefs down your throat you began to feel smothered. And that smothering feeling if left long enough turns to hate.( it has for me anyway). 

I can’t change the fact that I don’t believe but to be forced to go and pretend that you believe is something that no person should have to do. Why? Because doing it is like being stripped of your rights. That may sound too dramatic for some but it is the truth. 

We are all humans. We are all untitled to the same rights. To take those rights away from anyone in a means of making them into someone they are not is WRONG. Whether it is someone in the LGBTQ 🏳️‍🌈 community or someone who believes differently than you religiously. That is not an excuse to try to make them something they are not or to oppress their beliefs. 

I’m not perfect but I know what it’s like to be forced to do something that makes you feel like a little peice of you dies everytime. That feeling is a feeling I wouldn’t even wish on my worst enemy. 

My message here is to please treat humans as the individual unique beings that they are. 


Be at peace ✌️ and live in love ❤️ 


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