Hey Wild Ones!!
So if you have seen my post recent post (yesterdays) than you know that I said I have been in a little funk when it comes to writing. I won’t say that all of a sudden I am out of it. But today has been a day that has sent messages to my soul. Now I’m not a religious person. I am spiritual person. I like to do things that make my spirit feel good. And lately I’ve been in a funk. I don’t want to do much of anything and for awhile I was trying to figure out why. I mean I through this cycle. It starts with me wanting to do something, and then I’ll do it for like a week, then someone or something will make me want to give up, and I will. Then I am back to where I started.
That has been the nasty cycle I have continued to place myself in. The worst part is that I used the same excuses to take the blame for my current life situation off of myself and too place it on others. The EVEN WORST PART is that I cant preach to everyone else that they need to take responsibility for their actions yet I don’t. But that’s what this post is about. It’s about how last night as I sat in my “I’m not doing shit” funk watching shameless (my fave show). I watched as Fiona’s probation officer basically said ” We all have our own shit stories but you can’t keep blaming your life now on the way you were raised, your actions now are all you, you are not your father or your mother or where you grew up”. I was like DAMN. It spoke to me so much because that was the truth I have personally been running from like it is trying to murder me.
But honestly it’s the truth I need to live in. Was my childhood a shit story? YES it was; but I can’t continue to live my life blaming everything on my past because it is just that MY PAST. And then this morning I finally stopped being lazy and decided to listen to my Goddess talks and guess what ANOTHER message. Much like the one I got from watching shameless. In the conversation that Shann Vander Leek had with C. Ara Campbell they talked about how you can’t keep putting things off or allowing yourself to settle into a position because you feel like you signed some imaginary contract. You have to live! Fuck a bucket list live your life now and you won’t need that bucket list later.
GOSH that spoke volumes to me because where I am now in my life isn’t where I honestly seen my self. But I feel that I signed a contract that keeps me from leaving and not to mention fear of leaving and then everyone around me stops talking to me because I left.
Honestly I’m not a life coach or anyone who knows something. I am a simple girl who enjoys sharing the messages she receives with others just in case someone whether here now or just happens to stumble across this later can see that someone has been through something similar to them.
Be Brave and Live in you truth wild ones!!!!