What is a True Friend?

What is the meaning of a true friend? 

Is it that person who listens to you and gives you advice. Or is it the selfish bitch that only becomes your “best friend” when their is something in it for her. 

For each person the definition of a true friend or best friend or even bestie changes on a day to day basis. I haven’t lived very long. Well 21 years is two decades so maybe I have. Anyway back on topic, over the years I’ve called many individuals my best friend. And now that I no longer talk them it has led me to ponder on the question “what is a true friend?”  

For so many years I felt like I knew the answer to this question. But now as I type this sitting on my bed in the dark. I finally realize that I don’t (not even a little bit). 

My first best friend was a girl I met in Kindergarten. We’ll call her Ashley. She was bossy and I was passive.She picked what we did and who we talked to. At that age I was okay with it because what 6 year old just doesn’t want a friend. So I guess it worked for a while. That best friendship died in the 6th grade when I meant a new girl who we’ll call Sarah. Now Sarah by far was not a nice girl. She was the type of person that parents NEVER want their kids talking to. However, if your like me and have a mother who cannot give two shits about anything you do, this girl becomes the perfect friend. Now you may ask why? Well let’s be honest who doesn’t want to hangout with the bad-ass chick whose new in school is already cooler than you, but somehow wants to be your friend. 

So in the 6th grade when Ashley traded me in for someone else, I traded her in for Sarah. Now not only was Sarah bossy, mean, and rude. She also happened to be a compulsive liar. Please believe me when I say compulsive, I personally was her friend for many years and I can’t tell you if half the shit she told me was true. But back to the point of this post, Sarah became my second half. where ever we went it was always Marley and Sarah. That’s just how it was. You see Sarah and I didn’t stop being best friends until December 2015.   

You may or may not be asking how the hell this friendship lasted so long well here’s how. When you take a shy, broken girl whose home life is shitty and pair her with a broken girl who hides it well and pretends to care about her what do you get? To me you get a friendship based on what the other gives. For me Sarah gave me a person who pretended to care and to Sarah I gave what little I had that she wanted. 

Now during that friendship I had met others like Karen ( the I’m prettier than you type) and Kayla (the I want a little family now type). But just like my friendship with Sarah I was always stuck playing the Passive, Shy friend. But that wasn’t who I truly was it was who they needed me to be. So like a good friend I played the role. 

But all that would change one fateful day in Gym class when I never girl we’ll call Sunny came up to me and said hello. That simple introduction would be the one factor that changed everything I thought I knew about friendship and what a true friend was. 

So now I know that a true friend is the person who sees you when you can’t see your self. It is the person who see you for who you really are and chooses to still be your friend. It is the person who keeps you secrets and cries with you. It is the person who makes your spirit truly believe in friendship. Once you have found that person PLEASE never let them go. 

This is my story and feel free to tell me yours. 

xoxo Marley Fox ✌️💖😊

 

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